This is a good question. I am obviously not the same woman I was pre April 13th. Pre The Descent. Who was I? Who am I now? Who am I going to be when the fog clears?
I grew up in the city but I am a country girl at heart. I would love to win the lottery and buy a farm. Have some pigs and horses and a dozen dogs. To me, dogs are God's gift to us. He perfectly designed them to be our companions. I guess I had a typical upbringing in a blended family. I have one step sister and one half sister. I have two step brothers and two half brothers. I am not as close to any of them as I'd like to be.
I am a wife and a mother. Marriage isn't something I was looking for. I always thought I'd be a single mom, living in a condo with a kid and a cat. But my husband came along and ruined those dreams, lol. He's a great guy, so supportive of me and truly would do anything I ask him to do, he loves me more than I probably deserve sometimes. My daughter is a joy. She really is. I always say to her "why did God send me his best angel, what did I do to deserve you." I'm trying to raise my daughter as best I can to know God and to believe. And so far I think I'm doing a good job with that. If you read the post about us telling her about Blaine's death she just matter of fact said "I'll see him when I go to Heaven." I was struggling with my beliefs until I had her. But one look at her and there's no denying that someone wonderful is up there looking out for me.
I work in an office, it's pretty boring and very stressful. I don't like it but I don't hate it. I always wanted to be a teacher but didn't have the drive. Working was a lot easier than going to teachers college. I'm blessed to work with some great people though. Three come to mind easily. Ladies that have really been here for me. You never know who really cares about you til the floor falls out from beneath you.
I love reading, I am a Twilight fan!! I go back and forth from Team Edward and Team Jacob...pretty much depending on whether Jacob has a shirt on or not. I love anything written by Max Lucado. I love the Chronicles of Narnia and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy. I love John Irving and Wally Lamb. I love watching movies and t.v. I am a huge fan of General Hospital...can't miss my soap!! It's my guilty pleasure...well that and ice cream. Oh to sit and watch G.H. while eating ice cream!!
I think I'm a pretty good person. My biggest flaw is that I'm judgemental. It's something I really try hard to not do. I don't want to judge other people, especially other mothers. I love hard but not easily. I am a good listener but I've always been a bit of a loner so sometimes I'm awkward in social settings and don't know what to say to people.
And I'm sad. I'm really depressed right now. I'm struggling not to be bitter and angry. I'm trying very hard to just trust in God. I'm trying to get through this and still be all of the good things I was pre April 13th.
That is me. Thanks Danae for this idea. So, readers, followers, who are you?
3 comments:
i, too, am struggling with bitterness and anger these days. i, too, love to read - although i still haven't read the twilight books; i have the first two but haven't opened them. and while i have been good friends with many of the women i work with for a while now, i was awed and touched by the way not only they but all of my co-workers reached out to me when we lost kenny. it's reassuring to know we are surrounded by good people.
i'm looking forward to reading more of your blog.
Thanks for telling us a little more of yourself! :) The bitterness and anger is hard to let go. (((HUGS)))
Thanks for telling us more about you! And I so agree with you...if we lived closer, we could go and get lost in Eclipse! A break from reality is nice occassionally...especially now.
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