What Makes A Mother
~Author Unknown
I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today
I asked, "What makes a Mother?"
And I know I heard him say
A Mother has a baby
This we know is true
But, God, can you be a mother
When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can he replied
With confidence in his voice
I give many women babies
When they leave it is not their choice
Some I send for a lifetime
And others for the day
And some I send to feel your womb
But there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God
I want my baby here
He took a breath
and cleared his throat
And then I saw a tear
I wish I could show you
What your child is doing Here
If you could see your child smile
With other children and say
"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of love and life and fear,
but My mommy loved me so much
I got to come straight here!"
I feel so lucky to have a Mom who
had so much love for me
I learned my lessons very quickly
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much
But I visit her each day
When she goes to sleep
On her pillow is where I lay
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
And whisper in her ear
"Mommy, Please don't be sad today
I'm your baby and I am here"
So you see my dear sweet one
Your children are okay
Your babies are here in My home
And this is where they'll stay
They'll wait for you with Me
Until your lessons there are through
And on the day that you come home
they'll be at the gates waiting for you
So now you see
What makes a Mother
It's the feeling in your heart
It's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start
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Angel of my Tears
~Author Unknown.
How do you love a person
who never got to be,
or try to envision a face
you never got to see?
How do you mourn the death of one
who never got to live.
When there's nothing to feel good about
and nothing to forgive?
I love you, my little baby,
my companion of the night.
Wandering through my lonely hours,
beautiful and bright.
What does it mean to die before
you ever were born,
to live the lovely night of life
and never see the dawn?
Ah! My little baby,
you lived like anyone!
Life's a burst of joy and pain.
And then like yours, it's done.
I love you, my little baby,
just as if you'd lived for years.
No more, no less, I think of you,
the Angel of my tears.
Just Those Few Weeks
by S. Erlina
For just those few weeks
I had you to myself.
And that seems too short a time
to be changed so profoundly.
In those few weeks,
I came to know you...
and to love you.
You came to trust me with your life.
Oh what a life I had planned for you!
Just those few weeks...
when I lost you,
i lost a lifetime of hopes,
plans, dreams and aspirations.
A slice of my future simply vanished overnight.
Just those few weeks...
It wasn't enough time to convince others
how special and important you were.
How odd, a truly unique person has recently died
and no one is mourning the passing.
Just a mere few weeks..
And no "normal" person would cry all night
Over a tiny unfinished baby,
or get depressed and withdraw day after endless day.
No one would, so why am I??
You were just those few weeks, my little one.
You darted in and out of my life too quickly.
But it seems that's all the time you needed
to make my life richer
and to give me a small glimpse of eternity.
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A Lament for My Baby
~Author Unknown
I never got to hear you laugh
you never saw me cry
didnt get a chance to say "Hello"
you never said "Goodbye"
I didn't think that I could feel
so sad, lost and forlorn.
I never knew God chose his Angels
before some of them were born.
Your life was short yet special
I shared it all exclusively
I felt you breathe, I felt you kick.
You were alive inside of me.
Every baby is an Angel
and every angel is divine
God needed one in heaven
He came down and took mine
And although we are not together
we're not really apart
for you'll always occupy a space
deep within my heart.
Time has begun to ease my pain
It's only some days now I cry.
When I wish I could have said "Hello"
and heard you say "Goodbye"
An Angel Never Dies
Don’t let them say I wasn’t born,
That something stopped my heart
I felt each tender squeeze you gave, I’ve loved you from the start.
Although my body you can’t hold
It doesn’t mean I’m gone
This world was worthy, not of me
God chose that I move on.
I know the pain that drowns your soul,
What you are forced to face
You have my word, I’ll fill your arms,
Someday we will embrace.
You’ll hear that it was meant to be,
God doesn’t make mistakes
But that wont soften your worst blow,
Or make your heart not ache.
I’m watching over all you do,
Another child you’ll bear
Believe me when I say to you,
That I am always there.
There will come a time, I promise you,
When you will hold my hand,
Stroke my face and kiss my lips
And then you’ll understand.
Although I’ve never breathed your air,
Or gazed into your eyes
That doesn’t mean I never was,
An Angel never dies.
A Little boy
A special friend
A little fighter
Right to the end.
Gone from our lives
But not from our hearts
We'll keep you there always
Like we have from the start.
If tears could build a stairway,
And memories were a lane,
We would walk right up to heaven
To bring you down again.
No farewell words were spoken,
No time to say good-bye.
You were gone before we knew it,
And only God knows why.
Our hearts still ache in sadness
And secret tears still flow,
What it meant to lose you,
No one will ever know.
When we are sad and lonely,
And everything goes wrong,
We seem to hear you whisper
"Cheer up and carry on."
Each time we look at your pictures,
You seem to smile and say,
"Don't cry, I'm only sleeping,
We'll meet again someday."
~Unknown
I Will Carry You
By Selah
There were photographs I wanted to take
Things I wanted to show you
Sing sweet lullabies, wipe your teary eyes
Who could love you like this?
People say that I am brave but I’m not
Truth is I’m barely hanging on
But there’s a greater story
Written long before me
Because He loves you like this
So I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All my life
And I will praise the One Who’s chosen me
To carry you
Such a short time
Such a long road
All this madness
But I know
That the silence
Has brought me to His voice
And He says…
I’ve shown her photographs of time beginning
Walked her through the parted seas
Angel lullabies, no more teary eyes
Who could love her like this?
I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All your life
And I will praise the One Who’s chosen Me
To carry you
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The following two poems were included in the memorial card given to us by the funeral home.
Special Angel - Unknown Author
There is a special Angel in Heaven
That is a part of me
It is not where I wanted him
But where God wanted him to be
He was here just a moment
Like a night time shooting star
And though he is in Heaven
He isn't very far
He touched the hearts of many
Like only an Angel can do
I would have held him every moment
If the end I only knew
So I send this special message
To Heaven up above
"Please God take care of my Angel
And send him all my love"
Untitled - Unknown Author
Daddy, please don't look so sad,
Mama please don't cry -
Cause I am in the arms of Jesus
and He sings me lullabies
Please, try not to question God
Don't think He is unkind
Don't think He sent me to you
and then He changed his mind
You see, I am a special child
and I'm needed up above
I'm the special gift you gave Him
the product of your love
I'll always be there with you
and watch the sky at night
Find the brightest star that's gleaming
That's my halo's brilliant light
You'll see me in the morning frost
that mists your window pane
That's me in the summer showers
I'll be dancing in the rain
When you feel a little breeze
from a gentle wind that blows
That's me, I'll be there
planting a kiss on your nose
When you see a child playing
and your heart feels a little tug
That's me, I'll be there
giving your heart a hug
So Daddy, please don't look so sad
Mama don't you cry
I'm in the arms of Jesus
and He sings me lullabies
"In My Bones", written by Jim Cuddy/Greg Keelor: Blue Rodeo
When I first heard this song it immediately made me think of my daughter. You can never really explain to someone who doesn't have children how much you love your children. Since Blaine died this has become his song. I love him In My Bones, I grieve for him In My Bones. It is not just my heart that is broken...it is not just my outer shell, my life that is changed forever. It is my core. My existence is changed right down to my bones. I especially think of the part I put in bold. He is with me wherever I go.
You make me want to laugh
You make me want to cry
Make me wake up late at night and wonder why
You wash over me like waves over stones
In my bones
You make me want to get up
And be a better man
Make me want to weigh myself against my plans
You were born to me like kings to their thrones
In my bones
CHORUS
You can be what you want to be
I don't mind
If there's a season for all things
I hope that's what we'll find
But when it's time for you to go
Don't you worry
Don't look behind
CHORUS
Every time you walk out
You take a part of me
A part I hide so deep inside so no one sees
The beauty that nobody owns
In my bones
You walk with me wherever I'm going
In my bones
The Dance by Garth Brooks
I'm hardly a fan of Garth but this song just sums it all up. If I had of known I'd only have 17 weeks would I still have gotten pregnant? Would I have been content to have that time.
Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared beneath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known you'd ever say goodbye
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance
Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I the king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have changed it all
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance
Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I'd of had to miss the dance
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