This is me last Easter. It's strange because of the difference in the day Easter falls on. Even though Blaine's been gone more than a year now. Last Easter I was still pregnant. This is actually one of the only two photos I have of me pregnant with Blaine. Abby and I lived in the park that weekend. And it was the first weekend the ice cream shop was open so we were there too. I remember thinking how we'd spend A LOT of time at the shop during the summer, me getting nice and fat with baby. Blaine was already Blaine in my heart and mind. We forgot that the stores weren't open on Sunday and ended up with no Easter dinner. I had the Monday off work though and Abby had the Monday off school so we made our family dinner then. I was craving mashed potatoes and gravy almost everyday at that point. I had a doctors appt that Monday and Abby accompanied me. We listened to Blaine's heartbeat. It was strong and beautiful and we were so excited. A week later I was in the hospital.
This Easter has been rough because of all of the remembering. You really can't shake the "last year at this time" feeling. Abby and I are getting ready to head over to the park. We may hit the ice cream shop. We're having our dinner tonight and coincidentally I have a doctors appt again tomorrow. Abby will be off school and will come and listen to Caleb's heartbeat with me. At least if I end up in the hospital next weekend the baby will make it (or so I pray).
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