About My Girl

I was going to write about how good I've felt lately but I almost don't want to jinx it. I've had a couple good days like this before and then crashed so who knows how I'll feel in a couple of days or weeks or hours. It's that tentative. I'm feeling pretty crappy physically. Really lethargic and like I'm getting a cold. I'm going home to bed after work which is a good excuse to blog now!
Finally picked up B's urn on Wednesday and filled it on Friday night. Been wearing it ever since. I love it. It's actually a bit heavy but there's something symbolic about the weight around my neck. My daughter is jealous that I'm wearing something for him and not her. We have matching heart necklaces so I'm going to have to put my heart pendant on with B's pendant and wear them both. Have to be fair.
I'm feeling very thankful today, for my online sisters, for my IRL friends, for my husband who is so understanding and supportive, even when I snap at the slightest thing. And especially for my little girl. I don't know if I would still be on this Earth if I hadn't had her to come home to on April 13th. I am so overwhelmed by how much she loves her little brother. A brother she never got to meet or hold or look at. And yet she mentions him everyday. He's the first person she prays for at prayer time. She tells everyone about him and she's not shy at all. Even if I wanted to forget about him she'll never let me. I'll tell her, "you know you're my favourite girl" and she'll reply "and Blaine's your favourite boy." or I'll say "I love you to the moon and back" and she'll say "and Blaine too." I love hearing her talk like that and I hope she does forever. Yesterday in church they were giving the children's story before Sunday School and they were talking about how Edison tried 5000 times to perfect the lightbulb and the teacher said "how do you think he felt after the 4999 time?" and my darling daughter yelled out "he's tired!" lol everyone laughed. That's her...big mouth, big personality, big beauty.