I'm going through Caleb's 0-3 month clothes and giving some away/packing some keepsakes. We had not bought a lot of stuff for Blaine but there were some outfits sent by my Aunt out west. They were all 0-3 or 3-6 months. So, Caleb has gotten to wear some of his big brother's clothes. I find myself a little sad now that he's outgrowing them. Once he's past 6 months there won't be any more. He'll never get anything else from his big brother.
That sounds strange since his big brother never lived, never wore clothes. He came into the world naked and his body left naked.
Another way to look at it is that he got his life from his brother. Like I said in yesterday's post, there wouldn't be a Caleb if there were a living Blaine. As harsh as that is it makes me want to love this little monkey even more. To give him more, teach him more, spend more time with him, kiss him and squeeze him more.
2 comments:
I get what you are saying...he is a gift sent by Blaine to ease your pain. What wonderful children we have :)
I'll be in the same place you are in about 7 months. We have outfits that were Bailey's outfits, and Cameron will wear them. But, I, like you, know that if Bailey had lived, Cameron would not be the Cameron she is now. There still may have been a Cameron later on down the road, but definitely not the little girl I have plumping up in my belly now. And it's hard to imagine life without her now.
Such the irony of the whole situation. It's never simple and never will be.
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